Feeling a little Feisty

Previously published in the Summer 2014 but relevant for today just as much. 

[WARNING: I AM NOT YOUR AVERAGE CHRISTIAN. I DO NOT FIT INTO SOME MOLD OF EXPECTATIONS HELD BY MOST CHRISTIAN RELIGIONS. I DO NOT BELIEVE IN RELIGION IN AND OF ITSELF. I BELIEVE SOLELY IN THE BIBLE AND TRUST WHAT IT HAS TO SAY TO ME. I CHOSE TO FELLOWSHIP IN A SANCTUARY OF BELIEVERS, BUT THAT IS NOT WHO I AM. I AM SIMPLY A CHRISTIAN DEFINED BY THE BIBLE, NOT DOCTRINES. YOU ARE WARNED BECAUSE I AM LIKELY TO OFFEND SOME WITH THIS POST. THAT IS NOT MY INTENT. MY DECLARATION IS MADE PUBLIC AS A WARNING TO SATAN.]

Today my worst nightmare has been confirmed…. (this song popped into my head) “my past keeps playing with my head, failure strikes me down again, I’m reminded of the wrong, that I have said and done, and that the devil just won’t let me forget”… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZVjKrmvYYQ The insanity set forth to destroy my life has shown me the grip it has on someone dear to me and my inability to undo it, proving once again I have failed…

My emotions are mixed. I’m mad at myself for letting my guard down when I knew better. I’m angry at God because I trusted Him to do what I couldn’t. I am beyond pissed at Satan…I can hear his snarly-ass snickering with an evil grin smeared across his face that I would love to slap off. Unfortunately, it is not “flesh and blood I wrestle against, but principalities, against powers, rulers of darkness and spiritual host of wickedness “(Eph 6:12). He is just hoping this is one more setback in my life that will finally make me cave and stop trusting God to see me through. The saying, “I’m going to beat the hell out of you” has never been truer than now and if only God would give me the opportunity and power to do it.  I would take Satan on single-handedly if I knew Jesus didn’t already have it covered. (Satan doesn’t want me to pull out all my UFC moves- I keep them hidden for a reason).  So many more emotions tied up within my stomach…. I’m not even going to describe or discuss. Doing so simply elevates Satan instead of Christ, the one I want elevated

So, Satan, I declare WAR  on you this day, it is time for you and all your cronies to be on guard. I have a sword you WILL NEVER defeat.  It was given to me to “whoop data” [watch Meet the Browns you will know what I’m saying]….and “whoop” is being nice… You’ve chosen this battle but I am not sure you remember who you are coming against. It is not I that has and will continue to defeat you but Jesus (1John 4:4) However, the leader of this army has CHOSEN ME (Eph 1:4-5).  So guess whose side I’m on??? - THE WINNING SIDE- and guess what that makes me… a winner too.  BOOYA!!!!  

I AM a child of THE KING (Gal.4:4-7) sealed with more promise than I have even yet to learn (Eph. 1:13). I am the head and not the tail (Deut. 28.13). You, Satan, are the tail, (Isa. 9:15) the one who teaches lies and is the father of ALL lies. (John 8:44) Maybe you have forgotten Jesus has destroyed your power against me since I am one filled with the Holy Spirit (Col. 2:15), an overcomer (1 John 4:4), a believer equipped to perform great works that will glorify MY HEAVENLY FATHER (John 14: 12-14)

I will not be defeated. The Commander and Chief of the army I serve will never let me down, always stick by me and PROTECT me from evil. (2 Thes. 3:3). I live and move in him; I can’t get away from him (Acts 17:26). Through Jesus, I have already been given the victory (1 Cor 15:57).

You … demand proof that Christ speaks through me, believe me, you will get more than you bargained for. You’ll get the full force of Christ, don’t think you won’t. He was sheer weakness and humiliation when he was killed on the cross, but oh, he’s alive now—in the mighty power of God! I wasn’t much to look at, either, when I was humiliated by you, but when I deal with you this next time; I’ll be alive in Christ, AND strengthened by God.  You have been warned. I am not lying down and I am no easy target.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2%20cor%2013%3A1-4&version=NLV;CEB;MSG;EXB

THE BIBLE WAS GIVEN TO ME BY A MIGHTY GOD AS A SWORD THAT I HAVE PICKED UP AND PLAN TO SWING LIKE A CRAZY PERSON UNTIL I FEEL THE NEED TO REGAIN MY SANITY…UNTIL THEN MARK MY WORDS:

This is my bible: I have what it says I have. I am what it says I am. I am CONFIDENT not intimidated, meek or insecure, STRONG  and not weak, FOCUSED and not scattered, ABOVE and not below, THE HEAD and not the tail, A LEADER not a follower, SUCCESSFUL not a failure, more than a CONQUEROR; EQUIPPED, EMPOWERED, WELL-ABLED to ACCOMPLISH my dreams and GOD’S PLANS FOR ME. GOD STANDS BESIDE ME, GOES BEFORE ME AND PREPARES MY WAY

"REALLY"...EVEN BACK IN THE DAY?

Isaiah 49:20-21

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY  -20 The children born during your bereavement    will yet say in your hearing,‘This place is too small for us;    give us more space to live in.’21 Then you will say in your heart,    ‘Who bore me these?I was bereaved and barren;    I was exiled and rejected.    Who brought these up?I was left all alone,    but these—where have they come from?’”

*MY INTERPRETATION: While you are in the midst of mourning over a lost love one, your children will have the nerve to complain about their living space and request more. You will ask yourself, “where did these children come from? I feel as if I am the one who is dead and rejected. Did I raise these children to act like this? I feel so alone and yet these children….they surely are not the children I raised.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

How many times has my Mom asked herself this question? We-her children- have led her down this path one too many times. Now that we are parents, we have experienced those same emotions. I do not know how many times I have stated to my husband, “we did not raise her to be that way! Why does she act like that?” Well, obviously it is nothing new. If it occurred over 2000 years ago and was significant enough to leave it’s mark in the bible, then it was significant enough to inform us we are not in this alone. I don’t really know that that is a good thing or that it is even very reassuring, though. Nevertheless, eventually we look at those offspring of ours in pure amazement, with jaws hanging to the ground and the only thing we can think of is, "REALLY?"

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED: bereaved be deprived of a loved one through a profound absence, especially due to the loved one's death. barren bleak and lifeless exiled expel and bar (someone) from their native country, typically for political or punitive reasons. rejected dismiss as inadequate